The beauty of a woman,
isn’t in the clothes she wears,
The figure that she carries,
or the way she combs her hair.
The beauty of a woman,
must be seen from in her eyes,
Because that’s the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman,
isn’t in a facial mole,
but true beauty in a woman,
is reflected by her soul.
It’s the caring that she cares to give,
the passion that she shows,
And the beauty of a woman,
with passing years, only grows.
I love you enough to fight for you,
compromise for you, and
Sacrifice myself for you if need be.
Enough to miss you incredibly when we’re apart,
no matter what the length of time it’s
for and regardless of the distance.
Enough to believe in our relationship,
to stand by it through the worst of times,
to have faith in our strength as a couple,
and to never give up on us.
Enough to spend the rest of my life,
be there for you when you need or want me,
and never, ever want to leave you or live without you.
I love you this much.
Do you wonder what it would be like to HAVE a social life… Are you in a relationship that precludes spending time with anyone except your partner? If you are not “allowed” to go out with your friends, or alone, or if you have to “ask” for permission to do so, there is something wrong!
Do you get accused of extramarital affairs? I don’t thing anything sucks more than being accused of wanting to have sex with every man on the planet, especially after your sex drive has been effectively decimated by a partner who doesn’t respect you in the bedroom.
Does your partner stay out late regularly? Does s/he phone well after the time expected home and come up with some excuse why s/he’s late, and then say “I’ll be there soon” and not show up for hours? Or have you made plans to meet at a certain time and they don’t show up, or they are so late you can’t do what was planned?
Does your partner drive recklessly? Swear at every other driver on the road? Speed unnecessarily, particularly in the city? Do you feel safe driving in the same car?
Has your partner ever told you “no one will ever love you as much as I do”?
Do you ever wonder if you are alone with your thoughts and fears about relationships?
Do you ever think that maybe you are just imagining how bad your situation is because of all the media attention that abuse is getting these days?
Do you ever hear yourself saying…It’s not THAT bad, really… except when…”?
Do your friends ever say…”You deserve better than that…”?
1. You’re not as detached as you think.
Call it the curse (and blessing) of Sex and the City. Guys finally got the message that just because a woman wants to get naked with him doesn’t mean she wants a marriage proposal. However, it also advanced the idea of unemotional sex, which according to science is more difficult than it seems.
In her book Unhooked: How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love and Lose at Both (Riverhead Hardcover, 2007), author Laura Sessions Stepp highlights research studies that conclude having sex releases a different set of brain chemicals in women than men.
Specifically, women get a large dose of oxytocin, the hormone that makes you want to bond and create relationships. Men don’t get the oxytocin warm-fuzzies because of testosterone, making it easier for them to “love and leave,” at least biologically speaking.
Stepp says that evolution has hard-wired us for these tendencies, which can be confusing in our sexually liberated world. So be warned: You may want the sex to be casual… but you could end up with a serious case of attachment.
2. He may be cheating on someone else… with you!
Why is this your problem, you may ask? You’re not the one being unfaithful. But do you really want to be the “other woman?” The one who breaks up a relationship and causes another woman’s heartbreak? We’re guessing not.
Even the sneakiest guy can give away clues that he’s taken:
He only gives you his cell phone number and always leaves the room to take calls.
He’s quick to suggest hanging out at your place but never offers up his own digs.
He avoids taking you to certain neighborhoods (and not because they’re dangerous).
Suddenly no one has a name. He was out with “the guys” or “people from work.”
He becomes defensive when you ask him questions about his weekend plans, where he hangs out, etc.
Even if you’re not planning a long-term relationship with the guy, you should steer clear of him and his unfaithful ways. And if you’re hoping your night of passion leads to a hand-holding, boyfriend-girlfriend relationship, just know that once a cheater, always a cheater.
3. He’s a taker.
“Taking” isn’t always about money. A guy can be a taker in other ways – time, attention, your sexual generosity.
But first, the money: There’s no right or wrong about who pays for dates, as long as you’re both okay with the arrangement. However, if you open your wallet more often than you’d like and you’ve expressed this to him, then it’s probably time to cash in and call it quits.
He may also exploit your attraction in other ways. Can you pick him up from the airport? (Cabs cost so much!) Do his laundry? (He’s out of soap.) Host a couple of his buddies to watch the game? (You’re such a good cook.) Buy his mom a birthday present? (He has no idea what to get.) If any of these sound familiar, you’ve got a taker.
Unfortunately, this attitude usually continues in the bedroom. Don’t expect this guy to be attentive to your needs and preferences – most likely, his pleasure comes first and probably last.
Hot - or hopeless? Find out how you rate as a lover and pray you’re not guilty of any of these…
1. We don’t know enough about sex – or his bits.
‘She goes all giggly and girly whenever I try to talk to her about how to touch and excite me. She thinks it’s cute but I find it insulting that not only wouldn’t she have the first clue about how my penis works, she’s got no interest in finding out.’
He’s right – you do need to know some basic anatomy. While it’s true that what worked with Barry won’t necessarily work with Brian, our genitals are all wired up the same way and most of us have the same hot spots. Sex is a bit like typing. We can all sit down in front of a computer keyboard and bash something out using two fingers. But you’re never going to be as good as the person who uses 10 and took the touch-typing course. Buy a good sex book and study it. Once you’ve got the basic biology figured, combine it with ‘field research’ – touching and testing the areas that are meant to feel good when stimulated – and you’re bound to be a better lover than the girl who’s stuck at the point-and-giggle-at-his-dangly-bits stage.
2. We expect men to be mind-readers.
‘I asked if she’d had an orgasm and she said no. I asked her why and she said ‘Because I felt like oral sex and you didn’t give me any. If you really loved me, you’d have known that was what I wanted’.
Sorry girls but again, I’m on his side. Expecting your lover to second-guess your every desire is rubbish. Just because someone knows you well and wants to please you, doesn’t mean they suddenly have access to a crystal ball. Plenty of women think their lover comes equipped with an amazing radar which allows him to know exactly what she’s in the mood for at that exact moment with absolutely no input from her. Well, speak up or forever lie back and think of England.
Now being female you’d think I’d have a pretty good take on this one wouldn’t you! Well I do and I don’t. Women can come across as sweet innocent and vulnerable when in reality they might be lean mean manipulating machines! Game players extraordinaire , and therein the problem lies. While some women may show classic signs of being in love, such as being very clingy and bombarding you with an endless stream of texts/emails and phone calls, there are others who play a much more cunning game and will do the exact opposite of what you might expect from someone who is interested in you.
The game may involve, NOT being available for you, not chasing and not accommodating your every whim. This game is supposed to make it more of chase for you and thus men being men, will be more interested if there is a chase rather than it being handed to them on a plate.
Game playing aside, let’s start at the beginning. What are the subtle signs a woman likes you? Assuming you have just met, this may involve a few of the following:
I expect only men can really answer this question, but I suspect that generally men who are ‘in love’ will want to keep a strong hold on their ‘prize’ namely you and thus they will show some sign of wanting a commitment. The commitment could be in the form of engagement, marriage, living together, exchanging rings, or even a tattoo of your name printed across his chest!
Does this mean the notoriously commitment shy men don’t love you? Not necessarily so. It could though mean that they are not quite sure of how they feel and do not fully appreciate just HOW much they love you. This is a common problem for men who spend years with a woman, refusing to commit and then one day they find the woman has packed her bags and moved on. Only then do they seem to realise what they had and what they have now lost and go into over drive trying to get the lost love back. But for the woman, this could be too little too late.
Other signs of ‘love’ might be attentiveness. The man might desire and seek out your company and perhaps lavish you in affection and or gifts.
Some women may think faithfulness is a sign of love and that an absence of it is evidence of no love, but I’m not so sure about that one. Sex and love mean very different things for men and women and I know from the male friends I have had who strayed from their partners that they DID love them very much. What makes men unfaithful when they love someone is the topic of another blog!
Good evening sweetheart
What a great opportunity to see you again
You still look as beautiful as the first time we met
Did life treat you right as you deserve
Did your sweet dreams became true
Did you miss me as much as I miss you
Did I cross your mind once
I still remember the rides we had together
And I shed tears when I look at the empty seat
Where you used to sit
I missed your kisses and your gentle touch
I missed the soft hand going thru my hair
And the lovely green eyes
With that charming sharp look
Which used to take me deep into the ocean of romance
I’m sorry sweetheart
Sorry for all the promises I made
But couldn’t keep
Sometimes life and destiny
Stand against our will
(sigh)
If you want to know something about me
I stand still where you left
Torn between real life and our sweet memories
I only want to say one thing before you go
I still have that special place for you in my heart
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