Perfect Love Stories

Do you ever ask yourself the question, “Why do women break up with men?” Time and time again you will hear a man make the comment that his girlfriend or wife just broke up with him. And you’ll question why, because he treated her fantastic and actually appeared to worship her.

Did you ever hear that line “Nice guys finish last?” Well, there is a small amount of truth to that statement. Many adult females are not as self assured as they might be and any lady who is a little bit insecure will sometimes inquire why a really great guy would want her. So, if you appear to be head over heals in love with her, she will wonder what is wrong with you.

Are all women like this? Nope, of course not! Many women have the self confidence to know what they want in a guy and they’ll expect to be treated good or they’ll get out of the relationship. But there are many women who tend to use the “grass is always greener” thought process. The finest guy for them is the guy just around a nook.

So, what do you do if a woman breaks up with you for apparently no reason at all?

The 1st thing you WON’T do is call her, text her or go visit her. She apparently took you for granted while you were together so let her have some time to miss you.

Try not to act like you’re desolate, but alternatively get back out in the world. Go out with acquaintances, go on dates if you like. Actually, dating is effective because you just might find a girl out there who has the self assurance to prize what you offer up.

The real question you need to consider is if you genuinely want to be in a relationship with an insecure woman? Think about it. Is she genuinely worth it? If you absolutely think she’s the one for you, then you need to give her a lot of time and space to grow up. Repairing a relationship is always possible if the trust is still there.

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Human nature is such an amazing thing. We can’t help how we feel about things whether it be physical or spiritual. If you think about it we are quite judgmentive with everything we come in contact with or encounter in this life time. We expect things to be a certain way, and if it doesn’t go the way we had originally planned, then we throw tantrums. We are selfish creatures.

This leads us to relationships. Why and how do they happen? Why is it when we look at men or women of the opposite sex we either melt or cringe? It can be solely a physical attraction or personality. Whatever the traits they cause us to fall in love with the opposite sex. Is it really love though?

God created us to be dependent on each other through everything. At first you go out on a date to get to know each other. You find that you enjoy each others company and desire to keep seeing one another.

You can’t put a time limit on when someone falls in love. Some fall in love more quickly than others. How do you know when you are falling in love? You just know. You find yourself thinking about the person all the time. When you do your heart skips a beat and you get butterflies. You may break out into cold sweats at just the mention of the individual’s name. Why we react this way is a mystery. Love is such a strong emotion I don’t know where we would be without it. So many out there do not get the chance to fall in love and this to me is so heartbreaking.

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To make a man fall in love with you, you must first fall in love with yourself. How can a man resist a woman who is naturally spontaneous, effortlessly charming and completely charismatic because she is sure of herself and knows exactly what she wants and how to get it? The answer is, if he knows himself and is worthy of you, he cannot and will not.

If you want a man to fall in love with you, then, you must spend some time beautifying not only the nails, hair and makeup, but also the soul, psyche and inner light. Instead of constantly following the leader, strike out on your own and become your own individual beacon, forging your own trail. Find out what makes you happy and then pursue it instead of trying to stay “fashionable and trendy.” Spend time with yourself with no music, tv, cell phone… just some time alone to hear your own thoughts and ponder your own goals and dreams.

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All men have different needs and wants; desires and dreams; goals and aspirations. And although these things can be as diverse as men are individually, I am targeting only one segment of men for this article. I have chosen what I consider the five most important things MARRIED men want to hear.

1. KNOWLEDGE FROM HIM
Inside knowledge, so to speak, is a quality men gain over time, from education, and life experiences. A man wants to know that his wife asks him for help with certain things, because she KNOWS he has the answers. It could be knowledge on anything from doing minor car repair, to accessing websites online. From organizing work appointments, to fixing a child’s swing that has a broken chain. From how to get along with his mom, to how to cook his favorite “family tradition” spaghetti sauce.

2. THAT YOU APPRECIATE HIS HARD WORK
Hearing a wife tell her husband that she appreciates all his hard work is like him learning his favorite sports team just won [whatever] against all odds. It is a heady concoction that goes straight to his ego, ESPECIALLY if he feels unappreciated by friends, family, his boss, etc. Having you not only appreciate what he does, but SAY so, is what every man wants and hopes for.

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There really is a true man of your dreams out there, but he probably won’t come in the package you always anticipated. Almost every woman in the world envisions a tall, muscular man with great hair as her dream man, but more than likely, the real man of our dreams will look more like Kevin James than George Clooney (no offense, Kevin). Sometimes we let the man of our dreams pass us by because we’re so caught up in the package he’s wrapped up in, instead of the heart inside.

I’m happy to say that I’ve been married to the man of my dreams for almost twenty-eight years. He doesn’t look like anyone I ever imagined myself married to back in the days when I was still composing my dream-man-list, and he certainly isn’t as wealthy as the guy I was “supposed” to marry, but what the hay? Our twenty-eight year record speaks for itself. Beauty is truly in the eye of the beholder. My Micky Rooney looks like Tom Selleck to me.

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In today’s modern age, men and women are in pursuit of making money more than ever. Adults are taking longer to build satisfying careers, purchase homes, and start families. Putting off long term commitments.

Unfortunately, one thing that has yet to evolve with this new age - is a woman’s biological make-up. Our eggs gow older with each passing year. So do we have a right to be concerned when our boyfriends are not ready to commit to happily ever after?

Although it seems in Hollywood, that getting married is the new “dating”, it’s not that way in the real world. Perhaps it is a matter of economics, or maybe that’s an easy excuse to use when they are just afraid of commitment.

According to one source, “Most men like want to achieve some sort of career success before they commit to marriage. How are you going to take care of a family if you can’t even take care of yourself. Even if the wife works, being able to financially take care of them with or without their income is very important to most men I know.”

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Why men cheat on women is an age-old question. The reasons why men cheat on women can be varied. Nevertheless, we have compiled a list of the top 10 reasons why both married and unmarried men cheat. Sometimes their reasons don’t even involve you and it’s simply an ego-based decision. Other times, reasons why men cheat can involve you and your relationship, or lack thereof.

So why do some men cheat in relationships? Almost all men know that cheating is wrong, yet many they still do it. Men will blame their reasons for cheating on their genes and their necessity to reproduce. However, aren’t we suppose to be further evolved than a chimp? Shouldn’t we be able to control our bodies through our minds and conscious decisions? Aparrently not always.

Here are the top 10 reasons why men cheat:

1. Because they had the option. The old saying “men are only as faithful as their options” can sometimes ring true. Men don’t get offered sex as often as women so when the opportunity does arise, it can be very difficult for them to turn it down.

2. It boosts their ego. Sometimes men don’t feel like they are attractive to the opposite sex any more and when a woman shows some interest, not only does a man react, he may allow her to stroke his ego and more. There’s nothing like the thrill of the chase to men on the hunt. When they are finally rewarded for their efforts, their egos swell even larger.

3. You grow apart. Maybe the two of you didn’t have as much in common as you thought. He’s met a woman who has more in common with him who loves football or plays golf. He may check out if he is compatible with her under the sheets also.

4. You argue a lot. Men will sometimes cheat to get away from an overly critical or argumentative partner. Who wants to be around someone who is constantly on them about something.

5. He’s fallen out of love. Sometimes men become so comfortable in a relationship, they don’t know how to get out. They may be staying in the relationship because of children or financial reasons. However, they feel like they are missing out on love and may seek it out elsewhere. In their mind, this is as close to win-win as they can get.

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Did you ever notice how someone who was an “okay” guy in the beginning began changing and somehow down the road lost interest in the relationship? In the beginning the romance steadily climbed and after a couple of months reached its maximum intensity, but then suddenly hit a plateau, then it was downhill from that day on.

Loving then losing the man you thought loved you have always been a mystery. And when this new boyfriend comes along you tell him immediately the things you like and do not like because you wanted to be “honest” from day one. What happened in the past shouldn’t happen again, so you tell your new man the right way to show his love, and everything would be wonderful from the very beginning, right?

Sorry, but no. It doesn’t work that way.

A lot of women automatically think that she needs to “educate” their men and “teach” him how he should love her. Or you could simply be the woman that he loves. Honestly, you can’t teach and educate your man just to get the change that you want to find in him. In other words, you can’t be both a teacher and a lover.

For a man to be inspired to change, he needs to look up to someone he admires and tries to emulate. Only then can he change for the better, but remember that he won’t be changing for you. He’ll be changing for his sake.

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Emotional infidelity occurs when you or your partner become emotionally connected with someone outside your relationship, either in person or on the Internet.

How dangerous to a marriage or committed relationship is emotional infidelity?

One way of looking at emotional infidelity is that it is very dangerous, because it not only takes away time and energy from the marriage, but it can lead to sexual infidelity and possibly to the end of marriage.

Another way of looking at it is that it is a symptom of problems that already exist within a marriage. My experience with the couples that I work with is that, when the primary relationship is not emotionally and physically intimate, each person may be vulnerable to a form infidelity - either emotional and/or physical. Rather than blaming the affair for the problems, why not address the real problem?

Emotional affairs are compelling because it is so easy to be close with someone with whom you have no shared responsibility - no money issues, no children, no chores. It is easy to share your deepest feelings with someone with whom you have no conflict. It is easy to get the good feelings that you get when someone who doesn’t live with you and doesn’t see all your issues thinks you are wonderful. But it is a cop-out - an easy way out of dealing with the real issues at hand. And if this affair does lead to a break up of your marriage and into a new permanent relationship, the chances are you will end up with the same problems! So why waste your time? Why not deal with the problems now?

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Long distance relationships are no longer unusual in today’s society. In fact, they’re almost the norm! Internet dating, career relocation and higher education needs have created a worldwide singles scene for today’s savvy single. These days, it’s possible your girlfriend or boyfriend lives across the country - or even across the world!

Unfortunately, maintaining a long distance relationship isn’t always easy. The lack of private time together - coupled with different environments and experiences - can stress even the most loving of relationships. Fortunately, there are some easy ways to keep the spark alive when your lover is miles away.

Use technology! E-mail, text messages and instant messaging are simple ways to “touch base” regularly without the time (and long distance bill!) of a phone call. A quick note to tell your lover that you’re thinking of him/her can be enough to keep the fires burning.

Go old-fashioned! Sure, technology is easy and convenient. But there’s nothing like an old-fashioned letter to really touch the heart of the one you love. Since you have plenty of time to think about the words you want to say, your letter should be both heartfelt and meaningful. Use elegant stationary to make it even more special.

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